Rings fall apart: hightened rate of divorce in Nigeria.
By: AKINTADE TOFUNMI STEPHEN
Marian Webster dictionary defines divorce as the dissolution of valid marriage granted especially on specified grounds arising after the marriage. A divorce is the termination of martial relationship and terminats marital rights and obligations
“The ending of marriage by legal process”. Divorce is seen in married couple who are legally married not just hooking without legal base.
What marriage is, a union of two or more people that creates a family tie and carries legal, social or religious rights and responsibilities.
Divorce is the cancelation or reorganisation of the legal duties and responsibilities of marriage thus dissolving the bounds of matrimony between a married couple, under the rule of law of a particular country or state. Divorce laws vary from countries, divorce requires the sanction of a court or other authority in a legal process which may involve issues of alimony, parenting time, child support, distribution of property and division of debts. In most countries monogamy is required by law, so divorce allows such each former partner to marry another person, where polygamy is not divorce allowed the woman to marry another person.
Divorce should not be confused with annulment which declares the marriage null and void, with legal separation “de jury seperaton” a legal process by which a married couple may formalize a de facto seperation while remaining legally married or a process where the spouses informally stop cohabitating.
The major religions in Nigeria doesn’t support divorce thou, but there are some circumstances that may warrant divorce. It is better divorced than to be the late in some cases. The holy Bible frowns greatly at divorce, it says “it was also said whoever divorces his wife let him give her a certificate of divorce, but it say to you that anyone who divorces his wife except on the ground of unchastity makes her adultress, and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultry.
Islam doesn’t encourage divorce and separation, unless when a wife is found having intercourse with another man of not her Sunah and she must be guilty of the offense with at least three witnesses of the case. Nevertheless, Islam encourages peace and amiable dialogue between the couple if she can repent and seek for forgiveness. But if she doesn’t a man can avoid eating her meals and separate bed with her for at least three consecutive months with these, if she doesn’t realize her mistakes a man can release her to marry another man that can take good care of her in peaceful manners.
Reasons why divorce rate seems to be increasing in Nigeria.
1) Sex issues; sex is a serious issue but unfortunately, it is one subject people especially in Nigeria do shy away from discussing it because they of fear of being labeled as corrupt. But statistics have shown that most cases of divorce in recent times actually arise from issues related to sex. When couples don’t derive the needed sexual satisfaction from each other, they may decide to call it quit and seek the satisfaction elsewhere.
2) Superiority complex; most African men naturally heve ego issues and this has broken more homes in recent times. In this era when feminism is growing, most women who seek equal rights with their husbands are often quick to want to opt of the man’s superiority complex becomes somewhat irritating. Some couples don’t bring themselves low to apologize to each other and settle rifts, may stay away from each other.
3) Rushing into marriage ; this is another nagging factor that is making the rate of divorce high. Many people tend to delve into marriage without giving it a second thought and divorce becomes the next available option when they realize that they shouldn’t have entered it in the first place “babies marrying babies giving birth to babies” this will surely make their level of responsibility low.
4) Infidelity; the rate at which couples quiet is alarming and is one of the top reasons why many marriages hit the rock. It is common to hear people say infidelity is a deal breaker for then when it come to relationship. When spouses are not faithful to each other they tend to breakup with time.
5) Money issues ; lack of money is one of the reasons many home have been broken in recent times. Some gold diggers get married because of the financial stability of their partner and when they are not getting the financial satisfaction they tend to pull out. In as much as money is very important, but that doesn’t form the bases of jumping into marriage in the first instance because even if the money was there as at the time of sealing the marriage deal, a time may come when the money not be as sufficient as it used to be. Thou it is very essential of a man to take care of his immediate family first before anything else making him responsible. And a man should make himself the head not depending on the wife for survival.
6) Infertility ; many people get married because they want to have children and when they don’t achieve their aim, divorce becomes imminent for the inpatient ones. The issus of infacilities cloud come for ideal the man or the woman, but will leave in a society where women are grudge for the inability to consive. I get forrating and must women who can no r bear the fire will optou.
7) Westernaization; westernization and technology advancement have done more harm than good to the country. They top the chat of reseasons for the spate of divorce in Nigeria.
Must young couples want to model their marriage to look like what they see in movies obvious it of the fact that they leave in a different environment. They are distracted by the many things and the various social network and modern media are not even of helping matters.
8) Poor communication: Communication is a very important tool to every successful marriage. Same couples over stretch issues and it gradually degenerate to serious problems. Communication is life, while the gap of communication becomes too wide that such relationship begans to separate.
In every relationship spouses are expected to communicate with each other which will help them to express their feelings, views, pains, and wants.
When communication is deleted in a relationship the marriage is tend to hit the rock.
It should be noted that a broken pot can’t prepare a good food let’s know that the future of the children are in the hands of the parents and when separated it is often difficult to make the children happy and live in harmony. Let’s bring hands together because of the invited children. Marriage is a life institution which you don’t graduate from until death.